Title: The one where they're brothers
Warning: psudeo incest
Word count: ~1400
Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN JUSTIFIED.
Summary: Sometimes Raylan remembers the night that Boyd became his brother, or at least, he likes to think he does.Other: for mrsvc_sp, 'cause she's awesome.
Sometimes Raylan remembers the night that Boyd became his brother, or at least, he likes to think he does. He remembers a lot of crying. His momma had tears streaking down her face and the little kid holding her hand had those big gasping sobs that only your momma could fix up.In reality, he's too young to remember that night, Raylan just has a really good imagination, and lots of other memories to pull from to create the image in his head.Bo Crowder's bad business caught up to him, like everyone knew it would some day, and his family paid for it. Any Crowder that wasn't killed in the explosion went underground before the flames on the Crowder house were put out.That just left Boyd, who had been sitting outside of the house staring at the flames, his small body covered with soot and dirt. He didn't cry until one of the firefighters picked him up and some people say it wasn't 'cause he lost his momma and daddy, its because he couldn't see the fire anymore.Boyd had no where to go, no family to take him in.Frances though, she was one of the nicest people in Harlan County, despite her husband's personality. She was one of the first civilians at the Crowder property, and the only one who had the idea to get Boyd cleaned and into a nice bed. No one came to pick him up after he made it to Arlo's house, and it was the one thing Arlo never fought Frances about.Boyd stayed.Raylan was suddenly saddled with a little brother who wanted to crawl into his bed instead of the one across the hall because he missed his real brother and he couldn't crawl into Frances and Arlo's bed because Arlo could be just as mean as Bo and everyone knew that.It was nice though, having someone to play ball with when Boyd got old enough to catch a ball with his hands instead of his face. Sometimes Boyd talked too much though, his Aunt Helen said Boyd talked enough for the both of them plus some. Which was nice, it meant they got more candies from the general store that was down the street from the VFW, the lady that manned the counter always looked sad when she saw Boyd. Arlo could be mean though. Helen tried picking them up when he was at his worst but sometimes Raylan had to be the man of the house. Boyd looked up to him and he couldn’t let him down by letting Arlo have a go at him like that. It didn’t matter what Boyd said, Boyd was just a kid, you didn’t hit kids, especially the littler ones. So if Raylan had a few black eyes from running into doors, well, that’s what ice was for right?At least the kids at the school knew better than to pick on his little brother. Brian from up the hollow had thrown Boyd into the wall and said something about Boyd’s real parents and Raylan had him on the ground in two seconds flat,and the teachers had to drag him off Brian, but not before he broke his nose and bloodied up his face. No one around town said stuff like that to Boyd anymore, at least, not when Raylan was around. Frances died when Raylan was 14 and Boyd was 13. Arlo drank himself to sleep for a long time and Boyd started sleeping in Raylan’s bed again because neither of them could sleep with her death hanging over them.Boyd whispered about leaving, talking about how he was a bad luck charm to everyone. Raylan had to threaten to punch him in the mouth to keep him from talking like that. Raylan was scared to death that one day he’d wake up and Boyd wouldn’t be downstairs eating all the marshmallows out of the off brand Lucky Charms. He couldn’t loose his momma and then his brother too. Helen moved in after Frances died and sometimes she eyed them odd when she woke up before Boyd could get downstairs. She never said anything about the way they would curl up together, limbs entangled, and back then it wasn’t anything really. She would just give Raylan a look and walk down the hall to wake up Arlo. Arlo was too drunk to notice, much less care about what his sons were up to unless they were mouthing off at him. Raylan knew it wasn’t right though, and sometimes he’d wake up to Boyd staring at him and his chest would hurt and all Raylan wanted to do was hug him close and never let go, but instead he’d shove him off the bed and laugh until Boyd managed to scramble back on the bed and they wrestled until they were both breathless. The first time Raylan had sex it was with Allie May Johnson in the back of his truck when he was 15. It was messy and and sloppy and he didn’t once think about Boyd until after when she tried cuddling close to him and he remembered that morning when he woke up with Boyd in his arms. He froze and moved away from her and neither of them talked about it. Raylan couldn’t even bring himself to tell Boyd until almost a year later, when they had stolen Arlo’s moonshine and drove the pick up deep into the woods. Boyd had a hurt look on his face, like Raylan had cheated on him or something and Raylan knocked his shoulder against Boyd’s and said something about getting Boyd a girlfriend as he passed the mason jar over to his brother. Boyd froze up and looked at Raylan and Raylan remembered all the times he worried about Boyd leaving and he clenched his fists to keep himself from leaning in and kissing Boyd, because Boyd was his brother, and boys don’t kiss each other, much less if they’re brothers.Boyd didn’t think like that though, because he dropped the moonshine on the ground and shoved Raylan into the bed of the truck. Raylan cursed as the grooves dug into his back and glared up at Boyd but Boyd was staring down at him, opening and closing his mouth like a trout, like he was gonna say something, but he never did. Instead he pressed his lips into a thin line before leaning down and kissing Raylan like Raylan had kissed Allie May, but better, because this was Boyd kissing Raylan. Raylan thought about stopping Boyd, shoving him away maybe, or biting his lip, but instead pulled him closer. The kissing went on for a while before Raylan realized they needed to get home before Arlo was sober enough to hear the truck pulling in to the driveway. Boyd blinked at him and they stumbled into the house drunk on something other than moonshine. Boyd curled up next to Raylan with intent that night and they had to muffle their moans so Helen wouldn’t wake up. No one ever found out, Raylan was always a gentleman, and Boyd was still a Crowder, so no one suspected much when neither of them had girlfriends as long as they dropped a lie here and there. Raylan couldn’t leave Boyd when he turned 18, he worked in the mines for a year, despite the fact they were slowly suffocating his spirit more than Arlo ever could have, and when Boyd joined him a year later it some how made it worse. He knew he was going to die in a mine if he got stuck here. Raylan whispered plans into Boyd’s ear in the middle of the night, Boyd was happy when he was blowing things up, he was happy here, despite Arlo, despite the fact that his last name still gave him trouble. He was happy and Raylan couldn’t take that away from him. He skipped work one day and packed his things before he could stop himself. Boyd came home early and saw him throwing things into the back of the pick up. He had the worst sort of look on his face, and Raylan begged him to come away with him, do something with his life. Boyd looked betrayed though, and pushed past him and into the house. Raylan was gone by night fall, and out of Kentucky by sunrise.